In honor of Earth Day I made elaborate plans to celebrate with the proper behavior due such a solemn occasion. Since people were being asked to turn off their lights for a period of time to show their dedication to conserving energy and saving the planet from the evil of man’s devices, I intended to observe the day in a way that made much more sense.

I planned to spend the day with every light in the house turned on and extend my usual five minute shower until the hot water ran out. In the evening I was going to clean the dishes in the dishwasher rather than by hand and use the heat dry instead of air dry the dishes. Along with this, I would idle both cars in the driveway for a couple hours to consume what I felt was an appropriate amount of fossil fuels. In short, I planned to use the maximum resources, making my carbon footprint as big as possible.

In the end I did none of this. Not because of repentance or remorse, but because I forgot it was Earth Day. I went about my day normally, working to make a living for my family and to improve the world through meaningful employment. My original plan was to show the proper amount of respect for the Earth Day holiday. In the end I succeeded more than I could have imagined, because I ignored it and went on with my life. This is exactly what such a phony, hyped ‘holiday’ deserves.

That night my daughter reminded me that it was Earth Day and I had the opportunity to tell her the truth: “Eco-fascists are using alarmism to get people to give up their rights and freedoms. When the old Socialist revolution failed, authoritarian whack-jobs had to find another vehicle to remake the world in their image. This is not an effort to save the planet, but to make us submissive sheep.”

This is the perfect way to handle Earth Day, as an opportunity to share the truth with a young person about how fleeting are our freedoms, and how susceptible the masses are to propaganda.